
Lost
Season 4, Episode 12
Reviewed by Mike Archibald
We last left Lost with one of the most, if not the most, insane episodes ever. At the end Keamy, the physical leader of the freighter crew who looks an awful lot like Rocky’s large Russian opponent in Rocky V, is about to set off to start his backup plan of acquiring Ben.
There is a struggle on the freighter and Keamy shoots the ship’s captain and doctor. He and his platoon then head back to the island on their helicopter. At this point I think the writers of Lost should just start including scenes from the movie Predator, contextually it wouldn’t look like a big difference, and all you have to do is switch the Predator with Ben’s receding hair line.
This week on Lost their flash forward was of the Oceanic Six getting rescued. I think my major problem was that the last episode was so crazy and so mind bending that it made this last week’s episode seem shitty, sort of like eating a huge slice of the best cake in the world and then grabbing an Oreo -- the Oreo will be terrible and unsatisfying.
Kate and Jack head off into the island to follow the signal of the GPS radio that was dropped out of the helicopter as it flew over the island. They think it comes from Sayid, but he is actually coming by sea, powering by on a little boat from the freighter to the island. The GPS radio is actually dropped by Good Time Frank Lapidus, the official pilot of the freighter crew. The thing I like about Frank is that he always looks like he just got his ass kicked, plus he has the most amazing Hawaiian shirt collections I have seen.
When Kate and Jack are stomping across the jungle they run into Sawyer and Miles. This is where we find our weekly segment of “Horrible Nicknames from Sawyer!” Somehow Lost gets away with Sawyer saying some of the most ridiculous things under his breath, my previous favorite included Sawyer calling Miles “Donger,” but this week may have been some of the worst. Sawyer called Miles “Genghis,” which might be touching the edge of being rude and dubbed Good Time Frank Lapidus, Che.
In these less than amazing episodes -- meaning episodes that are just great or good -- we have to look forward to the ridiculous names that Sawyer comes up with off the cuff. When Kate and Jack meet up with Miles and Sawyer there is an awkward moment where Kate pretends like she gives a shit that Claire has gone missing, but really she is just thinking about trying to get after Sawyer while Jack is watching because she is manipulative like that. Kate then returns to the beach with Claire’s baby Aaron who was being carried by Sawyer.
The future flash forwards continue with the Oceanic Six doing a press conference where they “explain” their route to being rescued and what happened on the flight and crash. The majority of this information is false, thus uninteresting. Sayid meets up with his childhood love Nadia; sadly we already know Nadia will be killed so their reunion is bittersweet. Hurley’s mom also throws him a birthday party in a flash forward, having, get this, a Luau theme. I am pretty sure that the last thing Hurly wants is a Luau party after being on that damn island for over 100 days; that is like giving Kate a cops and robbers-themed party.
Hurley’s birthday party flash forward was actually really entertaining. He arrives at his house to find the front door left ajar fearing the worst for his family he grabs a golden statue of Jesus off a mantel and heads out door. He then realizes it is a surprise party for him and is then scolded by his mother with the quote of the week, “Jesus is not a weapon.” Hurley’s dad then takes him out to the garage with the thought in his mind, “Hey I haven’t made this party bad enough let’s try to drive him back to being mentally ill.” He shows Hurley that he has fixed up their old car, when Hurley squeezes into the driver’s seat he finds that the numbers 4,8,15,16,23,42 are the mileage of the car. I was so freaked out when I saw this that I had to leave the room.
The episode sums up with Ben being a dick, Locke being a pushover and Kate being a tramp. Oh, there was also a crazy moment where Claire’s mom approaches Jack saying him and Claire were brother and sister, which we already knew, but she comments to Kate that she has a very nice baby. It’s your grandson!
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