Reviews
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Rockstar Games Presents Table Tennis
By Tim Letteney
Platform:
Xbox 360
Publisher: Rockstar Games
Developer: Rockstar San Diego
Taking a look back at the games Rockstar has developed; one might
be a little bit confused when seeing their new title on the rack.
The name Rockstar has been synonymous with violence. Rockstar tackling
table tennis sounds a little bit like Jenna Jameson tackling Shakespeare.
Which is why there are so few people excited for this game, and
that is truly a shame. Rockstar Games Presents Table Tennis one
of most intense and enjoyable games available for the 360. One
must give credit were credit is due, Rockstar actually made a game
about ping pong, that is infinitely more enjoyable than actually
playing the game in reality.
Pong to the 360th Power
Rockstar Presents Table
Tennis is one of the most visually pleasing games to hit the 360.
The character animations are of such a high quality that they actually
effect how much the player is immersed in the game. The amount
of detail that has been placed into this title is quite impressive.
The clothes on the players appear as a separate entity, and once
the player begins to sweat it is visible on their apparel. Hell,
there is even a rumor going around that the most recent patch for
the game has decreased the previously overly well endowment for
the male players in the game, if that’s
not attention to detail, I have no idea what is. If only Rockstar
could send a patch my way, and do the exact opposite, my girlfriend
may not mind me playing video games so much. Another very nice
touch to the overall feel of the game is that they made the players
actually look human, not like they just finished a long day of
starring vacantly into a camera for some God damn soulless Gap
or Calvin Klein add; and then decided to take their surgically
altered bodies and newly formed noses for a nice round of table
tennis. It may seem small, but that is a very commendable move
on Rockstar’s behalf. They could have easily have put their
female players in bikini’s, given their breasts an engine
all their own, and sold quite a few more units, I’m looking
at you Itagaki.
Thank You Sir Can I Have Another!
The control scheme is quite intuitive, but Rockstar was nice enough
to include a training option in the menu. Once you get used to
putting the right kind of spin on the ball, and conquer placement,
the game really opens up. In a good rally one can get into a zen
like state of mind that is reminiscent of playing paddle ball on
the beach with a friend of family member, because face it, you
were never good enough at ping pong to hit it back and forth more
than a handful of times, and that time you could have practiced
you spent playing video games. Rockstar has added a rally counter
at the bottom right hand of the screen that not only adds pressure
to a high scoring rally, it adds replay value, and the ability
to create multiple forms of drinking games around it.
The animations are smooth and the fluidity of the character and
idle stance to an active hit never seems mechanical. Even the transition
from a focus shot (essentially bullet time) back to the game is
smooth. This game exudes class, yes, a Rockstar game…exuding
class. The only small eye sore that I have noticed are the scores
in the right and lefts corners that occasionally blink. It is a
small detraction, but in a rally that nears 100, any distraction
from the game is irritating.
Ping Pong
In line with the high quality and attention
to detail, Table Tennis’s
sound design and character voices are top notch, this will seem
like a given until you play games like Time Shift and
realize voice acting isn’t always so easy to nail. The in
game sounds fit quite well, but never draw an overt amount of attention
to themselves. The crowd sounds are convincing and flow with momentum
of the match. There is some in game music, but it only kicks in
once your rally hits 15. It is a nice touch that adds to the intensity
of the match and never seems forced.
Fault
Now it’s time to stop giving the good old folks at Rockstar
the preverbal reach around, and nicely ask them to put their collective
pants back on. There are a few things about this title that will
irritate some folks. The lack of career mode is surprising, and
it would be nice to have the ability to create a character (if
only to have them play in their underwear). I know Rockstar is
going for a “no frills” gaming experience, but the
occasional frill adds replay value, even something as small as
buying new paddles, or shoes, or grip tape, or whatever the hell
professional Table Tennis players do, because I honestly have no
idea, and have never cared until now. If not for an almost flawless
online experience this game would lose an immense amount of replay
value.
Above the Game.
I have heard loads of squabble
about this title. “It’s
table tennis, how fun can it be?” Hell, buddy, last time
I checked hitting a ball back and forth with a friend was pretty
fun. I know it sounds odd, but I think a lot of things that bounce
are fun, I’m looking at you Itagaki. I’m guessing
that everyone reading this has downloaded and enjoyed Geometry
Wars. You probably enjoyed that game a lot more than several games
that you have bought and already sold back to EB (so they can intern
sell them at full price (crooked bastards)). It’s simple
game, with a simple design, it’s fun. You don’t always
need to imagine you are some super ninja assassin that was grown
in a lab and drives a mech that shoots nuclear energy out of its
cod piece that occasionally strips girls of loose clothing to have
a good time. Some might say, “why play it on the 360, why
not just play it in real life? I have an answer for ya sonny, because
you are really really bad at Ping Pong, and have never enjoyed
it, much like Football, Baseball, Basketball, Boxing, and whatever
sports title that lines you shelf. Ping Pong never seemed fun because
you never had the coordination for it; we are all in the same boat
with you, so drop the attitude. This is a fun game, and it is well
worth your time.
Final Word
Rockstar Games Presents Table Tennis is a very entertaining
game that is certainly worth your time. This out of left field
concept shows that Rockstar is capable of more than violent third
person sand box shooters. This is a large step for the company;
I am excited to see what they tackle next. Who knows, maybe they
will make the best hurling game you have ever seen.
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